Uncovering Myths in love is a huge subject and this is by no means an extensive list. This is my experience with others and my own expectations within these myths. It’s also the beliefs around love that have messed me up. People like to measure my credibility by my relationship status. I’ve gotten comments like “As soon as you get married your business will really take off.”. It’s taken me a while to not only work through this but for me to believe that my relationship status does not say how good I am at being loving.
Uncovering Myths In Love
The first myth is that if you are in a relationship you are successful at love – I call bullshit. If you are in a relationship you are successful at being in a relationship. This does not mean you are successful at being happy in a relationship, or healthy within a relationship or even loving in a relationship. All it means is you have an agreement with another person at this time. Of course, this agreement can involve love and joy depending on who you are and how this agreement looks. But relationship status on its own is not a measure of love.
The second myth is I can only be ‘In Love’ if I am in a relationship – again, bullshit, this is a very outdated way of looking at love. The whole idea of conscious love is that I work at being IN LOVE first no matter my relationship status. From this place of love, which I have uncovered within myself, now I can share the love I am with another and share in the love they are. I do not need them to ‘Be In Love’, I am already love. If I am looking for love from another I am bound to be disappointed, let down, betrayed and all the other baggage that comes along with these sorts of relationships.
Third, my expectations define the parameters of my relationships and what I desire to experience – Truth is, expectations are the number one killer of love within a union. I am as guilty as the next person of this and have learned the hard way that if I am expecting him to show up in a certain way, or expecting the relationship to look a certain way I am setting myself up for heartache, disappointment and resentment. Not only that, when a relationship is built on expectations I am disconnected from the natural flow of the union and trying to make it into something it may not be. Either way, the relationship will be founded on disconnection instead of flow.
What To Do Instead!
- Know Yourself – when you first meet someone you desire to know all about them, have you done this with you? Do you know who you are? The better you do the easier it is to find the love within you.
- Find love within yourself – yes this is a journey, but so is life. To reveal the love within you sometimes it takes removing the pain, heartache and all the ‘stuff’ that is not you. When I say ‘stuff’ I mean false beliefs. Clearing away the faulty beliefs and old programs speeds this process up considerably.
- Relax into the flow of life – This takes massive doses of acceptance. Acceptance of you, your partners, the situations you find yourself in, and everything in between. Start practicing relaxing into the moment and observing instead of pushing your agenda.
You are so beautiful and radiant and lovable and all it takes is for you to start to see and feel this within you.
Follow the complete LoveExpanded Series on YouTube here.
Love, love, love
ps… need some clearing work done? Schedule a time to chat here.