What Makes Me Tick & What Ticks Me Off

Salenta Fox Connection Coach on the Ticked Podcast.

I recently was on the Ticked Podcast exploring what makes me tick and what ticks me off, listen for insights into me, who I am, why I do what I do, and how I got into this line of work.

Here’s their write-up and my episode. Enjoy. I sure had fun being on it, thank you Ben and Curtis.

iTunes Link.

Salenta is a mother, entrepreneur, energy psychology practitioner, and love coach. She assists men, women, and couples to identify and release limiting beliefs, patterns, and mindsets to instead live from love and be more connected to themselves, their partners, and their higher power. By clearing up triggers that impede deep connection, she helps couples connect more intimately through both sacred approaches and technical tips. The masculine still leads the feminine when you’re both aligned and safe. And it starts with talking about it more openly.

What Makes Me TICK PERSONALLY

  • Living from a place of alignment. Being centered in her values and goals yes, but more importantly, being centered and strong energetically, cultivating a strong presence, and manifesting an outward alignment with her inner core.
  • Freedom. Creating a life and lifestyle where I have the freedom to express myself outwardly how I choose. Feeling connected to a higher power through a higher love and feeling the freedom that comes from that ultimate connection.
  • Expansion and growth in knowledge, ability. Expanding into all of who she is, pushing her boundaries, comfort zones, being in all of her strength, power, value.
  • She references a book, The Four Agreements, by Don Miguel Ruiz – here it is on Amazon.

What TICKS ME OFFS PERSONALLY

  • When people do not see their value, their uniqueness, their gifts, their awesomeness and instead act and live from their limitations or smallness. She’s seen this in herself as well while breaking from her old self and starting on this new path. Using Energy Psychology to push through these roadblocks that she, and we all, place on ourselves.
  • When people blindly follow the norms and old structures or patterns that are hurting them. They stay in them out of fear and cannot shift into something they want or feel better because of this constraint they have put on themselves, or the constraint our society has put on taboo topics. 

What TICKS ME OFF PROFESSIONALLY

  • How the cultural and societal messaging about sex, which was meant to create safety, has instead created huge disconnection to our bodies and sex lives and then we are surprised why our personal sex lives suck.
  • When people discount sex as just a physical thing, and its usually the people who consider themselves more spiritual who do this. Only because they have not explored it from an energetic and sacred place.

What Makes Me TICK PROFESSIONALLY

  • Seeing people lighten-up, get new cognitions, and feel better about themselves and their lives.
  • Couples who can now relate from a real authentic place supporting each others in all their growth both individually and in their shared goals and life, instead of sheltering each others insecurities which made them both unhappy in the past.
  • Seeing couples and individuals who are closer, happier, and more vital by shifting their intimate lives, brining the sacred in, and connecting on a far deeper level.

Episode Link, iTunes link.

How to Get Over Guilt And Shame – LoveExpanded Challenge Day 4

How to get over guilt and shame – LoveExpanded Challenge Day 4 deals with something not unique to me, but something humanity deals with. Guilt and shame like to lurk under the surface no matter who you are.

The first thing I’d like to address is the illusion of having a perfect looking life. I call bullshit. At some point no matter how things look, shits going down under the surface.  Bringing it to the surface does not make you wrong or weak – and don’t allow anyone to make you feel that way. Talking about how you feel is healthy. Bringing the sneaky little lies up to the light is not only healthy but necessary to lower the power these energies have over you. When you don’t talk about it you feel alone, but when you are able to acknowledge it, even just to yourself in the light of day, you can start to see guilt and shame as the dirty little liars they are because 90% of all the guilt and shame you are carrying around is a lie.

Addressing and acknowledging feelings, underlying driving forces, and emotions is the first step to clearing them up, this is a powerful tool.

I am learning so much already and this is only day 4.

The big take away. Just by acknowledging these insecurities and thoughts in my heard to myself makes them dissolve and it makes me feel so much better, I hope the same can happen for you by coming along on this journey and Expanding Your Love Too.

If you are struggling with guilt and shame and you feel its keeping you stuck – drop me a message and I’d love to share my tools with you. Schedule a free chat to see if we’re a good fit. 

If this message assisted you in any way please share it with someone you feel might need to hear this. Follow the whole series on YouTube.

Love, love, love

Salenta

Harvard Study On What Actually Makes Us Most Happy & Healthy

When it comes down to it, being more connected and having someone in your life you know you can count on, not only creates more happiness now in your life, but also predicts how healthy you will be in old age.

Here are some highlights from this study that tracks 724 men over 75 years. 60 of these men are still alive, most in their nineties, with one of the participants being a US president.

Good relationships make us happier and healthier.

Important messages and 3 Big lessons from this study. Some of the highlights.

  • Social connections are really good for us, and loneliness kills. 7:50
  • Loneliness is toxic. 7:58 (1 in 5 people are lonely at any given time.)
  • It’s the quality of your close relationships that make all the difference. 8:40
  • Conflict is really bad for our health. High conflict marriages without much affection is worst for us than getting divorced. 8:51
  • Living in loving relationship is protective. 9:02
  • How satisfies you are in your relationships predicts how long you will live and how healthy you will be at old age.  9:09
  • Good close relationships buffer us from physical pain.  9:45
  • Being in a good secure relationship in your 80’s, where you really feel like you can count on the other person in times of need, those people’s memories are better longer. 10:25

Conclusion, foster and put time into your relationships now for more well being in all areas of life.

Love Love Love

Salenta

Do You Believe You Have “To Do” To Be Loved?

Do you have a belief that to be loved, or lovable, you have to prove yourself? And you prove yourself by DOING?

You “DO” all day long, you serve, you give, but not because you want to, but because you feel this is what you “HAVE” to do in order to be loved or even be considered lovable. Sound familiar?

You might think you do all those things for the one’s you love out or pure service, but if you have the belief that you have to “DO” to be loved, your service is actually driven by obligation and duty than out of love.

The different is subtle, but SO very important.

If you escaped this trend, good for you, but more than likely, you saw someone you loved “EARNING” love in this way.

And that’s what it is, earning love. Do you feel like you have to earn love? Do you feel that just on your own, as you are right now, without doing anything, you are good enough for love? Could that be possible?

If you have this belief, it’s okay, you are not alone, but it is blocking you from having the free flowing, abundant love you desire.

This belief brings a heaviness to it, and is laden with obligation, strings attached, and expectations. “If I DO all these things for you, in exchange you have to love me.” It’s not pure, it’s not fresh, it’s not light and free.

Yes, you want to serve and be served within your love relationships, but you want to do it freely and have it done freely, if it’s not done in this pure manner, it’s not really love. It could be a range of other great emotions but love is not one of them.

The problem with “DOING” to be love is you can never do enough to receive the amount of love you desire. It will never feel like you are getting enough.

Firstly, because the other person is most likely oblivious to the unspoken arrangement. They have no clue what is going on, and because of this, might not play along in the way you would like. They might be bad at exchanging in this way. They probably will not love you because you do anything.

Secondly, even if they did love you for doing all you do, you most likely won’t feel it or recognize their love because ultimately, you do not value yourself or feel you are worthy of their love.

Vicious cycle huh?

Yeah, it does not feel good to either person involved. You don’t feel good because no matter how much you do, it’s never enough to get the love you desire. And it does not feel good for the other person because the exchange is heavy and feels needy and filled with obligation.

So how do you get out of this cycle?

First, bring these beliefs to your awareness now, explore them, see all the ways you try to earn love, all the things you do because you think you should do them, instead of doing them because it feels good to do them.

Secondly, see and feel these ideas floating away, and in their place, a new thought appears, a thought that you are lovable just as you are. 

You are lovable just by being you.
You are lovable just by showing up.
You are lovable just by breathing.

You do not have to DO anything to earn or prove your worthiness to receive love. 

Say to yourself, “I am enough just as I am.” Say this each morning and each night before bed until you believe it, until it is a part of you. I am going on three years saying mine every night and morning, I replace the affirmations every year or so. It works, but you have to be consistent, even when you think you don’t need to say them anymore, do it anyway.

Each time you find yourself not feeling worthy or love, say it again.

You have a lifetime of the other thoughts dominance, it will take persistence, consistency and repetition to reprogram the new thought and belief, but it can be done.

Thirdly, you can clear the old thought out using QEC (Quantum Emotional Clearing), speeding up the process and clearing out the old attachments and habitual responses making way for the new input.

From this place of being enough, you can express your love in all the ways you desire, and your expressions will be pure, they will be clean, and from this clear space, like energy will come streaming to you.

Love will come streaming to you.

The motives behind what you do make all the difference, even when on the surface everything might look the same. 

Ill motives or energies block the pure flow of love to you and from you.

Addressing these motives, becoming aware of them, and shifting them will in turn shift your experience with love, making it more pure and free flowing.

Practice and play with the affirmations, if a clearing session is in order, schedule one today with me or someone else.

I am deeply honored to share this message with you.

Happy loving.

Love Love Love

Salenta

The Difference Between “True Like” and “True Love”

I love getting questions from readers.

Todays question is; What is the difference between “true like” and “true love”.

Answer:

Putting the true in front of it is a whole other question. So let’s start with the difference between like and love.

People often think of love as romantic, and there should be criteria for love but… this is not always the case.

You can feel love for someone or something instantly and I am not talking about infatuation, I am talking about having an open heart and feeling and connecting to another human being or even a tree or cloud. All things are emanating vibration and energy and by connecting to it/them, and feeling it, and sending your own love out to it, and feeling their energy and receiving it… this is the exchange of love.

Described like this, it is possible to love everything and everyone. And, I suggests trying it out just for fun and feeling how this feels.

Like, on the other hand, is similar in that you can feel good vibes from someone or something and you like them, you feel an affinity to it or him or her. So yes, you can like someone instantly too, and you do all the time right?

I remember my dad would always say, “Just because I love that person, does not mean I like what they are doing.”

This has always stuck with me, especially regarding relationships. I love past partners dearly and always will, but, I do not like the things they do and just because I love them, does not mean we need to be together. 

Love has nothing to do with being in a romantic relationship or partnership. The first criteria does not guarantee the last.

When you put true in front of love or like, this is no different than not having true in front of it. Truth is an arbitrary thing that is only yours, and it can change, contrary to popular opinion.

When people talk about love they often put true in front of it, true love, to imply that it is deeper than another love. But, love is love. There is no unconditional love, or true love, there is only love.

So, when it comes down to it, you can put true in front of love or like, but, that only means what you want it to mean.

If you take the word away, and feel into yourself, and trust yourself, you will see that all like is true, and it might change, and that is okay. And, all love is true, even if it changes.

From my point of view, for love to be true… it needs to be honest, meaning you are really connecting with this person because you want to connect and give and receive without expectation or wanting from them, if there are other motives involved and you only love them when they can give you something, like safety, or love, or feeling wanted. Then this is not really in alignment, it’s probably love with a whole lot of programing on top of it obscuring the ‘truth’ of what love really is.

So true love; loving purely for the sake of connecting to another, feeling their love, and sending your love out to them, with no thought or expectation of what follows.

True like; really liking someone or something and being honest about your feelings.

Please let me know if this was helpful or not. And… thank you for the question. I always appreciate them and keep them coming. 

love love love

Salenta

10 Fundamental Keys to A Successful Long Term Marriage/Partnership

There are many reasons people get married, and falling in love with someone is only one.

Others get married to not be alone, for convenience, for citizenship, for land ownership in foreign countries, for children, for money, and everything in between.

But if you truly want to have a fulfilling relationship where both partners are on the same page, with the capability to work through the inevitable rocky storms that will ensure, some fundamental things have to be in place for a successful partnership that stands the test of time.

There are many reasons marriages do not work, and I’m not convinced it’s the institution that’s to blame, I believe it’s the people within them lacking the skills to navigate such an arrangement that is more likely the culprit.

I recently saw this post on Facebook.

“When I see people younger than 30 getting engaged I just want to yell, “ruuuuunnnnnn!” Or “your first marriage will be a good learning experience… try to wait to have kids.” Am I too cynical?”

While I am all for waiting a few years to get hitched, especially living in Utah, on the other hand, the idea that age has anything to do with a successful relationship is a bit naïve too.

I work with people on their second, third or fourth marriages, ages ranging from 20’s to 60’s and age has very little to do with anything. There are 60 year olds who still have not got themselves or relationships figured out yet.

What I have found is there are some key factors that make relating and navigating any relationship, especially an intimate one, vital.

The following factors are essential for the possibility of a lasting long-term relationship and partnership, and a happy life. (The last is just a bonus)

First, you need to know why you want to get hitched. Not that any reason is better than another, but knowing brings awareness, and once you know why, then you better know how to proceed.

Discussing this and bringing it to the surface before the knot is tied if possible, reveals expectations (usually there a boat load more) and you can agree or disagree if those works for each party.

When two people get together unspoken agreements are made, this way you are conscious instead of unconscious of what is really going on beneath the surface.

Second, what are the subtle hidden insecurities? Clearing and addressing these insecurities before the big day, or after, opens the space for a healthier clearer start and future.

It eliminates greatly you projecting all your funk onto the other person and brining things that can be avoided into the mix.

Ideally, addressing these and clearing them with someone who knows how makes for even smoother roads. Just knowing and then blaming stuff that comes up on the insecurities is not productive.

Don’t hide behind them, but resolve and move forward in love and openness instead.

Third, honesty. Make an agreement to always be honest. I mean taking honesty to a whole new level. Not just telling the truth, but telling the sometimes brutal truth, and nothing but the truth.

Telling it how it is even if you might hurt the others feelings. Not hiding or keeping things from the other to protect them. Always coming from love and sharing in a loving way, but, knowing that being honest is the most loving thing you can do.

Forth, being transparent and not taking the other persons stuff personally. People see right through you anyway, if you want to believe it or not. So, lay your cards out on the table. Don’t hide, be upfront. This goes along with honestly, but, it goes deeper.

This means you allow each other to talk about your deepest feelings and insecurities, hurts and pains, and can tell the other how you are feeling without taking it personally.

You realize what you are hearing from the other is their experience and probably has nothing to do with you, and if it does, have the maturity level to look at yourself and address it.

Firth, have a firm sense of self. Know who you are. This is an unfolding, and age does play into this, but it’s more about allowing your true self to come forward. Exploring who you are, accepting who you are, and being okay with you just as you are today – self-love.

Once you do this, you will attract someone who is most likely in the same place, (please pick someone in the same place) and you are 100% further ahead than most couples. And if you are not in this place, start working at fining out who you are and loving what you find, it is never too late.

Sixth, discuss the idea of purpose within the relationship. Being in such close proximity with another human will bring up all sorts of “stuff” and is an excellent place for you to grow and evolve.

Being aware of purpose, and discussing what the purpose within your partnership is, separately and joined, makes for common goals and objectives. These will change and morph as time goes on, and as each of you change, so keep in mind this is not a one time thing.

Having a common goal is one of the main things that happy and successful partnerships have.

My favorite purpose for relationships: deciding this is a container and vehicle for growth, a place of free expression with both of you constantly striving to express more of who you are and growing within this. You will show me areas I can improve on, and I will show you this too, all in a loving supportive way.

Seventh, bring consciousness and awareness into the partnership.
I cannot tell you how many people I have spoken to who are divorced or getting divorced who only got married because it seemed like the next thing to do. There was no real thought that went into it.

All the things stated above require a level of consciousness and awareness, but, if this is new to you. Work on it. Find out what this is and what it means, and get to adding into your life.

Be aware of why you do things. Ask why. What’s really behind this feeling, behavior, or action? How is this thing the other person is doing really about me, and not them?

Instead of always blaming them when things go wrong, turn it onto you first. Use the relationship as a way to grow and expand, clean house, and become the best version of you. Not because they want you to be, but because you want to be.

Ask if you are projecting your insecurities and “stuff” onto them, and pretty much 99% of the time, the answer will be, you are.

Get to work on YOU, and something magical will happen, suddenly the other person will change too.

Eight, emotional maturity. Oh boy, this is a biggy. Allow yourself to be vulnerable, to share, and be open with your feelings. Emotional maturity is really a culmination of the things on this page, but it also includes being emotionally available.

How you do this is allow yourself to feel. Be brave enough to share those feelings openly and honestly, with yourself first, and then your partner. Cultivate listening and being genuinely interested in your partner. Set a time aside regularly to just talk and explore each other, like you would a friend.

Being available means you are there for each other on an emotional level, if you do not understand the other, work at it, ask more questions, ask them what they need from you, and then do your best to do it, even if it’s hard and feels uncomfortable. No hiding.

Sixth, accountability. Take responsibility for your own shit, own it, no projecting your stuff onto them. Next time you accuse them of something, turn it around to you and ask if you have this trait. It’s usually something within you, you are not satisfied with that is annoying you in them.

Address it in you first, and see what happens. You will be surprised it might just vanish in them automatically.

Nine, ability to get over yourself. The world does not revolve around you. Not everything is about you and most likely when there is something up with your partner, it has nothing to do with you.

Hear them, remove yourself from the equation and be there for support. Show them love, ask them questions and see how you can both work through the issue together. This means dropping the defenses, excuses and need to validate yourself, your wounds and your actions. Be open instead for solutions and growing together.

Ten, be in an attitude of serving, what can I give, not what can I get. You would be surprised to see what happens when you shift your attitude. Maybe you have been together for months or years, no matter.

Consciously shift into a mindset of what can I do to make the other persons experience better? What can I do to serve them today and show I care for them and love them?

These can be little and big things, and they make the world of difference. They not only cultivate love, but passion and admiration too. Both of which will fade with time if not actively cultivated and grown.

Happy loving. And make this fun, use your partnership to grow and evolve personally and together too, it’s fun, challenging, and will bring you closer than ever before.

An extra tip for success… LIGHTEN UP!! Life is serious enough, your relationship does not have to be. Add playfulness and lightheartedness into the mix, especially when exploring and navigating some of these areas that may be harder for you.

Life is more fun with copious amounts of joy… so add in joy and start laughing at all your silliness instead of crying or yelling. I dare you 😉

Love Love Love
Salenta

Forgiveness – 3 Steps to Release the Past and Get the Relationship You Desire

Forgiveness is Key to releasing the old and letting the new in. 

 

If you find yourself in the same situation, different face, this might just be your golden ticket off the train and onto getting what you truly desire.

Find more peace, lighten up, and feel better now.

love love love

Salenta

Feel More Safe With Better Boundaries…

I write for other magazines too…  this article is published @ www.overthemoonmag.com. Start reading here and find the rest at the link.

“Until you feel safe within, nothing outside will feel safe and secure. He or she might promise you the world, and even deliver, but you will still feel insecure and want more, their offerings never being enough.

Can you relate?

Safety is your foundation. It’s the core — from here everything else is built. Only when you have this within can you feel it from others.

Safety and love go together. You tend to seek safety from love, or more like your lover. But this only holds true when applied to YOU. You feel safe when you love yourself and create good boundaries, and you do that by loving yourself.

The more you LOVE YOURSELF, the easier it is to create safety within you. The more love there is, the more safety there is.

How do you get this safety from within if someone on the outside cannot provide it to you?

Let’s first establish where safety is NOT found:

Safety is not found in gripping to what you know, or the past.

Safety is not found in… Continue Reading

Love love love

Salenta

3 Powerful Steps to Forgive the Past, and Create The Relationships You Desire.

When you hold onto the past, it is difficult to create a new reality or get different results.

This relates to relationships as well as to anything.

All this talk of creating the life you desire. This is different from attracting the life you desire, something you hear thrown around a lot. Let me clarify,  creating is you being active and taking action, this is where the real result come.

But, until your energy field is clear of the old, you will be attracting what you do not want, making it difficult to create and bring in what you do want.
What does forgiveness have to do with creating the relationship you desire?

It turns out you really do create the world around you by the vibrations and energies you emit and send out all day long. To create a different experience it is said, you have to ‘be’ different, but how do you do this?

I had a first hand experience with this, where my past was impacting my present without me even knowing it.

Let me share what I found.

First, it’s important to realize there are no secrets.

No matter how hard you try to hide, withhold, and keep down, you are a transparent being and people can SEE you NO MATTER WHAT.

They see your demons, feel them, and know they are there, even if you deny them. You carry contempt for a past lover, new lovers feel it, and it does not bide well for your new potential partnership

The more aware your crowd becomes, the more the issue of hiding just becomes laughable. People ‘feel’ what’s going on even if they don’t know ‘exactly’ what they are feeling, but they will respond accordingly.

Even the most unconscious person still see’s, unless they are choosing not to.

I’ve been through some ‘stuff’ like most people, and some of it’s not too rosy. There was some abuse in my life that I kinda just swept under the rug, not just a one time thing, but things sprinkled throughout my life. I don’t think I even really acknowledged how bad it was or how much it impacted my life, I had the rose colored glasses syndrome, or just the denial syndrome ;).

I essentially was hiding it, even from me, but it was not hidden at all. I was still vibrating it, it was still in my energy field and aside from attracting other situations into my life that hurt me also, others could consciously detect this too.

Having it still linger was influencing my NOW experience.

About a year ago I fell ill and knew it was time for an upgrade. Within two weeks, two messengers came to me, a close friend and an acquaintance, both with the same message.

Both could see and feel this abuse around me I was denying or wanted no one to know about. But they saw is, clear as day. And they could also see how me denying it was hurting me.

This was a good lesson, and opened the space for me to acknowledge, heal, clear, and move forward.

The first step, be upfront and transparent from the beginning, this means with YOU FIRST.

Second, forgiveness, and this means forgetting too.

Yes, forgiveness. And no, this is not church. But all those religions have it right because this is a universal truth. Forgiveness has a power greater than most even comprehend.

I attended an Energy Conference in Bermuda and the science of it. Dr Vitaliy, a Russian scientist has been studying energy for almost 3 decades and as he was explaining the energy fields around the body, and demonstrating on someone from the audience, he first tested and showed all the imbalances in the man’s field, then, to my surprise, as he was showing us how to bring the man back into balance, before he did anything, he asked the man to first ask himself for forgiveness. Now remember, Dr Vitaliy is a scientist, so this really surprised me!

The man did it, the Dr. tested again and suddenly just like that, the man was all balanced, nothing more needed to be done.

Miracle? Maybe, or this is just natural law at work. Forgiveness is powerful.

After identifying, forgive yourself and those who might have harmed you.

It’s in the forgiving that the magic happens, and all the shmoots can be released, just like that, instantly.

Forgiveness is as simple as telling yourself, “I forgive you.” It is important to forgive those who harmed you too.

Third, to forgive, you have to forget about the wrong. I know you have heard this before, but how do you do it?

Without forgetting the energy is still trapped, and will come back to haunt you, so to speak.

In my own process of forgiveness my mentor and friend explaining forgiveness is not complete or does not work without forgetting the wrong done.

Forgetting means not talking about it anymore, not thinking about it anymore and replacing the past negative thoughts and stories, with positive thoughts around the same person that hurt you.

When you think of that time in your life, or that person, you reprogram yourself to have good memories that bring good feelings.

By doing so you lighten up, and change the vibration around you clearing your energetic imprint of what happened.

This way you start to vibrate and radiate the good feelings instead of the hurt and wound. You clear the space for new to come in.

You clear the space to let in a fresh new love that is more supportive and loving. (This is not only effective for past lovers, but for anyone who harmed you.)

I know that sometimes you might have to dig hard to find something good, but there always is something.

Forth, the power of the word.

You create with your words. You can believe this or not, it’s still true. Gravity is going to pull down despite your belief, this concept works the same way.

Start speaking what you desire.

Only speak in terms of what you want. Stop speaking about all the sh*t that happened in the past, let go of those stories and start telling stories that describe the life and experiences you desire now.

You might contest and say this is not true, but, the more you speak it, the more it will be true.

Forgiveness means forgetting what happened. This means changing the story, let go of the old story, stop talking about what you don’t want, and start talking about what to do want.

Start speaking about your relationships in terms of what you desire most now, like it’s already happened, like you already have it.

To demonstrate just how powerful your stories are, and the energy they carry, let me tell you a brief story, no pun intended. 😉

I was on a field trip with the kids, the weekly ice-skating outing in the winter. I am still a beginner, but after about 30 min I had gotten my feet under me, and I was feeling and skating pretty well.

I started speaking about an incident in my marriage around why I stopped liking skiing with another mother. I recounted a traumatic incident and as I did so I instantly noticed my feelings change, my body became tense, a thickness developed in my thought and sternum, and to my surprise, I also noticed my skating changed dramatically for the worse.

I started skating again like I had 30 min earlier. The negative emotion brought forward by the story had not only effected how I felt in my body but my outward experience and performance too. I felt like I was going to fall down, that is how much it impacted me.

I stopped talking immediately after realizing this and started focusing on more positive things, and realized in that moment just how powerful that story was, and I decided I no longer needed that story. I no longer needed to feel so low, so overcome, and so bad.

I chose to feel good and light and limitless instead. I chose to release all those stories and recreate my memories. I was the one who created them in the first place, why not create one’s that bring me more of what I desire and made me feel powerful instead of weak.

Let’s recap.

1) There are no secrets, be honest with yourself first. Release the hurt and pain you are carrying from your past.

You are emitting the vibration of what you are hiding and it’s not hidden at all, and you are most likely still attracting similar situations to you.

2) Forgive. You are infinite and good and nothing that has happened cannot be forgiven. You are divine. You are pure.

And it is not only okay, but imperative that you allow yourself to be forgiven and forgive those you feel have harmed you.

It will change your life, your health, and what you are sending out to the world. You are worthy of good things.

3) Forget and release the negative stories. Your words are powerful creators. To change your experience and what you get back, you have to change the input.

Start speaking about what you want, and never stop.

Speak in the positive, “Please keep your clothes in your closet or in the hamper”, not the negative, “Don’t leave your clothes on the floor.”

You are powerful. You can change your life experience. You can create the relationship you desire, but there is work to be done. Creation take effort, you cannot just sit there are wait for life to happen to you.

Forgiveness is powerful, until you forgive your past lovers, it will be hard to attract, and let in, a new relationship.

Forgive your current lovers too, you might be surprised at the changes that come about once you release them.

No one wants to be with someone who is bitter and still in hate. They can feel it.

This will not only change what you create in your experience, you will also feel better, lighter, more free, more alive, more vibrant.

love love love
Salenta

ps… Please leave a comment, I would love to know your thoughts and please share experiences you have had with this, you would be surprised how much your input helps others.

“The Longing Soul” ~ A Poem

Can you relate? Have you ever felt this?

“My soul is aching for something.
Longing for something more.
I can’t place a finger on what it is, but it’s there, ever present ever nagging.
It’s an emptiness, a void, a black hole of wanting.
Wanting something more, wanting something deep and complete.
My soul aches to find it, know it, touch it.

It searches in vain trying to fit an unmatched puzzle piece in the wrong hole.
Trying this way and that, like a little child hoping if he tries long enough eventually it will fit.

All I desire is to feel that love, that complete, ever encompassing, filling, love.
The kind that quenches a thirst after a long day in the sun.
That fills an empty belly leaving it satisfied and full, happy, and content.
But, where do you come from?

I have tried to blame you on not having a lover in my life, but when I do, I still feel this hole.
I know you are out there love, I have tasted the sweetness of your presence before, long ago.
I have felt your warm embrace, your blanket of peace and serenity, your electric current running through my veins, your calmness that brings content.

When will my time in the sun come, when can I expect to see you again?
My soul is bursting to know your completeness again; part of you is still inside of me waiting to be let loose freed from your cage.
I feel you within my chest violently clawing to get out, burning inside, ever reaching, expanding, consuming my every thought.

Your presence is strong; at times I feel I cannot go on for the intensity.
It’s as if you are building, more pressure added by the day just waiting for someone to unleash your wrath.
The sweet wrath of passion, of complete devotion of pleasure and purpose.
It’s this someone who is needed to set you free, someone to adore, honor and serve.

This someone is no one else but you, but me.
Me filling this hole, me filling the void.
Me letting me out of the cage and allowing my greatness to come pouring out, streaming out and joyfully embrace each day.
Love me so big and bold I scare myself.
Embrace me so violently I cannot help but giggle with joy.
Be me.
Lovingly, joyfully, playfully, sensually, sincerely, openly, passionately, outrageously, romantically, creatively, unabashedly… fully.”

 

I wrote most of this poem in 2009, the ending was revised. Since then so much has changed. Since then I no longer feel this hole, but when I wrote this, I felt it every day it seemed.

I thought having a lover would fill the hole. I thought making money would fill the hole. I thought my kids would fill the hole. But nothing did. Nothing from the outside.

It was around this time, when I did have a dear love in my life, and still felt empty and depressed that I realized this hole was inside of me because of parts of me I was denying. Pain I was holding onto. I didn’t know much more.

But as I healed that pain, and accepted more of myself, I realized the more I loved myself, and brought out those parts of me I was embarrassed about and made fun of and judged in others, the more the hole was filled in.

It was love indeed I was searching for. But not the love of another. Love from within.

This was the only love strong and sufficient enough to do the trick.

Now as I sit here, and realize that until the hole is filled within, even the grandest love you get from another will never feel like enough.
And now, as I sit here with the hole filled and I have love from another, it is so full and rich and encompassing, warming and comforting, allowing me to finally relax into it, and enjoy it fully for what it is.
Ps… if you feel this hole and emptiness within. If you feel the weight around you neck pulling you down even though things are good in your life, there might be something else missing.
There is something big inside of you wanting to come forward.

Part of you loving you is allowing your bigness out, allowing your passion and purpose to come forward and touch the world, and those around you.

Are you afraid? Are you holding yourself back out of fear?

If so I have been there too, and being on the flip side is so much better. Yes, there are still challenges, but now, I can handle them with courage and passion and they make me feel expansive instead of imploding.

Check out the Foundational Femme- Embody the Feminine. This is what I did to get to where I am today. It’s simple, and it works.

Love Love Love
Salenta

Ps.. I love hearing from you. It might not seem like much but your voice and input inspires others, you are not alone. Please leave a comment below.